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 Well hello there. 

It was exactly one year since the event that happened in Japan last year. A tragic event. 
It involved a 9.0 magnitude earthquake and a 45 feet high tsunami. 

Last year on this day, I was in the bus on my way back from Sec 3 Level Camp in Malaysia. It was raining, already flooding. some other unfortunate schools camping in Malaysia (Penang) had the water all the way up to knee level, ours was only ankle high. traffic was surprisingly light. I had to use Shang Chao (who's now studying in Vancouver)'s phone to call my mom to pick me up from school. She told me she's at a hospital cause apparently my younger brother fainted due to dehydration during camp. Already saddened, I went around to ask for coins so i have money for transport home. I took the bus home. Reached home to unpack my bag then went online. And then news came up. Emails came in. Facebook and twitter was flooded with the news. 

I do think deeply about things like this. 
I do pray for everyone's safety. 

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On a side note, I met #AGEPOYOWAVE yesterday. 

Managed to summarized my day yesterday hah. 
Here you go!

3 hours of dancing, 2 hours of slacking, met #AGEPOYOWAVE at Orchard at 4, went to Raffles for picnic, met Yuto-shirt-wearing-Dana, Arashi coloured cupcakes from Venna, picnic in the middle of town, ran to colour the Merlion in Arashi colours, took a couple of great group photos! 

How Can I love?

 Title: A moment of silence

Pairing: YamaRyuu

Summary: It hurts.

It was just last year. Everything happened too fast. I sat up the sofa, and put on my glasses. Silence filled upon the room. The room felt small. Today was supposed to be our fifth year anniversary. I gave a dry smile as I read the letters we used to exchange to each other. An hour later, I lied on the sofa. How could I have cheated death, without you?

1 year ago..

“You have a meeting on the tomorrow at the Enterprise Building at 4pm. Be sure to bring your materials as it’ll be the last meeting for this event!” My supervisor reminded me. I nodded my head in silence. It was our 5^th year anniversary. You were expecting me home early tonight because you had to take the plane later in the evening for your concert.

When I reached home the lights were dimly lit, you carried an alluring smell when you opened the door for me to greet me. It led us to a kiss. Your lips, your warmth, I finally received after a long day in the office.

We met when I was still an elementary student, you were in junior high. We didn’t met each other again until eventually ten years later through coincidental. You were a singer which I admired. I was into Shoujo, you like Shoujo. I was at the anime festival, cross dressing. Despite me being tall, the blonde wig and right make up and dress and shoes totally fooled my friends. They were amazed too when they saw me. You were shorter than me, and was actually the first guy to come up to take a picture of me. I recognise you when you first came up. We clicked from there.

You made a very homey dinner. We had konkatsu and miso soup. When done with the dishes, I helped you give your luggage a final check before sending you off to the airport. Originally I was supposed to join you for your tour in America but I had work. My flight tickets cancelled.

I helped you to pull your luggage while you went to claim your flight tickets with your work people.  I looked at you with a smile when you turned back to look at me. I saw tears welled up in your eyes. You blinked and then ran to me. You hugged me crying. You didn’t want to leave me alone for three months. I smiled, and then wiped your tears.

“It’s only for three months, time will fly faster than the speed of light.” I said. Despite you being older than me, I was feel that it was the complete opposite. Even with me doing the cross dressing, your feelings were much passionate. You pursed your lips, I can’t take it. Just last. You hugged me real tight and then gave you the kiss you wanted.

“Yamada we have to go now.” one of the crew said. I let go of you and waved as you left.

I drove back silently. Took me a two hour ride before dropping by a combi to buy myself a bottle of beer and cream puffs. The worse had yet to come. As I was paying for the items, I had myself attracted to the television.

“Sorry can you increase the volume of the tv?” I asked. He cashier was kind and did increase the volume. It was news about a plane having an engine failure and ended up crashing with another plane in the sky that was landing.

“God no..  No.. NO.. NOO! GOD HE WAS ON THAT PLANE!!!!” I eventually collapse to the floor and burst into tears. I was wailing like a baby in an almost empty store. The cashier looked at me pitifully and kept my beer away.

For days I lied down on my bed, our bed. You were gone. Your fans missed you. Your family missed you. I missed you. Only the people close to us went for your funeral. Everyone knew how miserable I felt. I couldn’t eat, I didn’t had the appetite. I didn’t go for work, I couldn’t concentrate. A month later I recovered. I was able to speak, I was able to go to work, I was able to eat. However all these were just done half heartedly. I didn’t put in all. I still couldn’t find any reason for me to live.

And now that a year had passed, I dressed up, prepared to go to your grave for a visit. I really miss you, Yamada. Happy 6^th anniversary...